So it should come as no surprise that these are often the first clues people recognize in cases of paternal misidentification. I do know she's not mine but I love my daughter so much, I could never say someone else is her father." That's … I found out at 15 that my father was not my birth father. (Did dna test with other man) The worry I carry about with me about him finding out kills me and the guilt I feel about not telling him kills me. I am 18 years old now and recently I found out through a dna test that my father (who I have known as my father my whole life) is not my biological father. About 4 months after finding this out all these physical symptoms started. Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts. I confronted my mom about it but she wouldn't tell me an honest story so I went to my grandma and aunt (my … A few months ago I found out my dad was having an affair with a woman at his work. I decided to do this on my own. But now everything has changed. I found out that I was conceived between my biological father’s first and second marriages. Turns out her mom had an affair with the family doctor and never told a single soul. Very similar story except her parents tried to pass off her told her darker skin and curly hair because she was Jewish. It's up to you whether to meet with your father alone or ask someone else to come along. He'd not been paying her the maintenance and things like that, making life extremely difficult for her. This doesn’t justify any of his behavior or attitudes towards me. Quite often a question of paternity is more than just doubting whether the father is the biological father of a child. My twin … He asked and found out that his mom was raped by 6 men. In fact, they didn’t even tell me. When i was a little girl i used to dream my dad here wasnt my real dad. I discovered recently after having my baby that I have O+ blood. Choose a neutral, relatively quiet location, such as a park bench or a calm café during daylight hours, where the two of you can speak to one another easily and express emotion. I feel like I have been lied to my whole life (I'm 26, my father doesn't know yet, he hasn't seen the results). There's nothing to gain by spilling the beans, and lot to lose if you do....like your mother's life or well being. I uploaded my results to 2 other sites. The man who I thought was my dad does not know he is not my dad. I didn’t really believe it was possible that my dad wasn’t my father, but I indulged the spawned-by-aliens scenarios of my youth and asked my 90-year-old dad if he’d take a DNA test “just for fun.” Despite my inklings, I felt torpedoed when he turned out to be 97 percent … I'm just mad at my mother for putting us through this. That's where your responsibility lies. by Anonymous: reply 61: 05/04/2017: R58 You're a real moron if you can't see this is a troll post. So I feel it's a luxury you can't afford...let go of it. My aunt was in the same situation but found out her parents are her aunt and uncle her bio mom was the one she thought was her aunt. I think time will change how you feel about them both. Happened to me when I was much younger (9) but found out through an annoying relative; it really affected me. It's very unexpected and upsetting. I’ve always known my dad is not my biological father. I was not a daddy’s girl growing up, but as I grew to an adult, my dad and I have an awesome relationship. “Found out the little girl I was raising isn’t mine when I found my gf’s journal,” a man revealed on anonymous site Whisper. "We're a family. My brother Duncan came over my house saying he needed to talk to me. " Last year, my mom came home from work white in the face saying that my dad … Why did your mom and dad agree to do the test when it was obvious what the results would be? Something important in your life happens: college graduation, marriage or a child. My father took drugs, gambled and saw prostitutes weekly, often several times a week. It was still 1:03 in the morning when I picked up the phone to call my mom. This is ruining my life. No easy way of doing it. Til my crazy aunt sent me a nasty message about it e even called me a whore. Just woundering if anyone can give … Deep down I love him and I'm heartbroken. It was the most gut-wrenching conversation I’ve ever had. I’m 19 years old, going to college, living at home, and pursuing my dream career. Your dad writes you a letter – a pretty big step for someone who never shows his emotions. So I saw my dad's account and some conversations and I am almost 100% he has cheated on my mom. I'm 30. “It truly feels as if someone has ripped my heart out. It was obvious but I was told some convincing lies. Here I was at the top of the roller coaster and it started falling, my stomach ripped out and was left behind me. It took just 36 hours from the time I learned that my dad was not my biological father until I found the man who was. Maybe the bio dad was already pretty mixed and OP is only a quarter black so in that case I could see it as a possibility. You begin to tear up and really remember that your dad is just a person too and despite the fact that he’s a terrible husband, he’s a great dad. And even after you're 18, I'll still be your dad, so get used to it! My parents broke up just before my mum found out she was pregnant with me. The number of children whose biological father isn’t their social dad is probably far smaller than you’ve been led to believe, although the 30% figure seems to … It’s either she had a random hookup with a black man and tried to hide it, or she was raped or something terrible and didn’t want to talk about it. I was told when I was about 14 years old by a cousin, that she heard my dad was not my biological dad. Sounds like she doesn’t have a good relationship with her dad, but both parents agreed to get tested? I had just found out my dad wasn’t my dad. But I don't feel it is my responsibility. (Did dna test with other man) The worry I carry about with me about him finding out kills me and the guilt I feel about not telling him kills me. couldn't bring him back. If they knew surprises they took the test? I do feel I deserve the truth, but a part of me also feels as though these DNA results have already opened my eyes. Content on HealthUnlocked does not replace the relationship between you and doctors or other healthcare professionals nor the advice you receive from them. I lived my whole life thinking I'm the grandchild of Jewish holocaust survivors, and I'm not. I agree that it is not your responsibility and maybe not your right to do so. I suffered horrendous addiction and alcohol … 1 0. Today I found out through 23andme testing that my dad is not my biological dad. Is there any way for me to know if he was in fact my father? In addition, it’s possible to inherit a pair of recessive genes for features that neither biologi… i just found out for sure my dad os not my dad. I’m not sure if I was most upset because I never expected my dad to be involved with such sin or that it seemed to be an indication of something I have feared for too long: that my dad … “And it’s the cruellest betrayal. My dad always treated me different (worse) than my sisters, and now my fears of not even being his are validated. I asked my mother about it and she became furious and slapped me for even asking. The room started spinning. I asked my father what type he was an he told me he … Help me, I have bruises and am abused, and so is my mother. Ok, so earlier today i found out that my dad has an account on some site for adults to meet up, and have sex. My dad isn't my biological father either, only I found out when I was eight. It will take some time to get used to the idea, but the important thing is that your dad is still your dad, and he needs to know that nothing has changed. At 28 I found out my dad is not my biological father. OP= Why I no longer pay the monthly fee She … 469 likes. “Apparently they were sleeping together though and my mum was sleeping … How can u tell a person to not show fckn rage when they’ve just found out there dad ain’t really there’s?? have an interview this afternoon but I'm so down right now I don't know what to do. The man who I thought was my dad does not know he is not my dad. Yeah, if I were you, just take your mom to a quite place like a park and just have a open discussion. Finding Out My Father Was Not My Biological Father @ 27. We lived a good lifestyle, but the income he was earning was enough that he was spending thousands of dollars a month chasing hedonistic highs. I wished I could be there to give you a hug. The fact that you aren't biologically related, and yet he has invested so much of his resources in you, must mean that he's really devoted to you. “If I leave, all three of us are screwed.” I am 15 years old, and this is driving me insane I found out my dad was another man when my brother bought me an ancestry test – and even my mum didn’t know the truth . I just found out that my biological dad is a random rapist, criminal, and drug dealer who raped my mom. They took their tests together years ago. I have been searching for my biological father for a long time and further to a lot of time and effort, I think I may have found him! i found out that my dad was not my biological too- its crazy and i was upset at first then realized it doesnt matter because a father is someone who donates the sperm and a dad is someone who raises and loves you- i even found out a few years ago and im 19 and can handle it so you will be fine. But my mom definitely lied to me about my “dad” being the only person she’s ever been with. I look JUST LIKE him. It’s filled with truths about how he wasn’t the greatest father but that he loves you and is so proud of you. Both of my parents took the test a few years ago, and I’m not really sure what took me so long because I’ve been curious about my ethnicity my entire life. Xper 3 +1 y. a man once asked his mom the same question. Your physical features, and to some extent your personality traits, are a direct result of the DNA you’ve inherited from your parents. Plus he has cool friends like Emerson and Thoreau to inspire you when he's busy off doing something weird like trying to build Utopia. I literally had no clue and never a reason to question for the last 50 years. I feel like I have been lied to my whole life (I'm 26, my father doesn't know yet, he hasn't seen the results). And if she found out that I'd still wanna meet the dude, she'd flip. I would suggest having a talk with your mom privately and discuss about the DNA you found out with a open mind (no anger or any negative feelings) and see how it goes. Because I was worried that my dad would find out the same way I did, through the website, I spoke to him in person that same day. She replied that she had just found out her dad was not her biological father. She and his dad … Today I found out through 23andme testing that my dad is not my biological dad. We are not close but he has been in and out my life. At least it feels like she was playing you. But Im about to search for it. The man who I thought was my dad does not know he is not my dad. (Did dna test with other man) The worry I carry about with me about him finding out kills me and the guilt I feel about not telling him kills me. He married my mom when I was four. I never knew that! Later on, Dad’s older sister told me that he had once told her: ‘If Becky finds out that she is not my real daughter, it doesn’t matter because I see her as my own.’ It was a sweet revelation for a man of so few words. Don't fix it if it ain't broke. Both of you are adults and I think that you deserve a honest answer. My mother only told me about my real father 4 months ago because i found out she was lying, i found im half Spanish and i met my bio father but im not allowed ever to talk about it to the dad that raised me and not to mention i went to Spain and feel this is unfair. It wasn't until I took a DNA test that I learned I am, in fact, 28% Japanese. :), Sorry about this. I felt your deep sadness. Hope you have an outlet to vent frustrations. This couldn’t wait to be sorted out. See, my father (the father I knew) and I had a tough relationship as I grew up. 7. Her mom had an affair, and her story of coming to terms with her identity was compelling. Im not! Elephants in the room often fade with time. I'm just like my "dad" I grew up with though, I even became a professor at the same university he teaches at & in the same field. I’d probably just say, “I took a 23andme test and it connected me to you, but not dad” and let her do the rest of the talking. Answer (1 of 14): Well in my opinion you should call him dad...cause I have a similar problem but mines a bit different.....I know my dad is not my dad I been knowing since I was 8 but I have never told my parents.....but I know it wouldnt of been a problem cause I love my dad cause he was there from the start to now and he was there through the bad and the good and I know hes … I’m 38 years old. Even I thought it just told you your genetic breakdown and maybe if you had a long lost cousin somewhere. She wasn't raped, but had an affair, and the guy involved was nearly … Here all of this time my mom told everyone she was raped and I was a product of that rape, but she told me something different. momof3cc. About 4 months after finding this out all these physical symptoms started. Later on, Dad’s older sister told me that he had once told her: ‘If Becky finds out that she is not my real daughter, it doesn’t matter because I see her as my … But I got my results today, and on the family tree section I am connected to my mom, but not my dad is nowhere on the chart. But now we found out that not only is he not our bio dad, but he didn't even really adopt us either. My mother told me if he ever found out he would kill her. So what to do now? Martha Cliff; Pilar Mitchell; 30 … Look forward. Mine were dealing with this for months before I knew for certain. My … No, haven’t heard of it. Most families know things that are never discussed because the damage would undoable. My Dad's Not Happy About My Roblox Channel.. - Enjoy!Never miss a video by enabling ‘ALL’ Notifications! Talk about your genes and their possible implications! The man who was in and out of my life was a narcissistic, impossible to satisfy asshole. His results didn't look right, so I called him and up and he said "I was expecting your call". Dear Abby: I recently found a notebook of my mom’s. Live your life to its fullest. I have children and cannot be a good mother to them anymore because of my physical symptoms. My family always knew there was a possibility, but never got a test done. I am 18 years old now and recently I found out through a dna test that my father (who I have known as my father my whole life) is not my biological father. Mom won't tell me the other guy's name. Your dad might not be swift when it comes to paying the bills or staying out of debt but he is a big fan of letting you spread your wings and experience life. If you were the one to have the DNA done, I think you DO have a responsibility to step back and be quiet. She answered and I said ‘Hey … He'd not been paying her the maintenance and things like that, making life extremely difficult for her. Just woundering if anyone can give me some advice.Im 25 and I just found out that my dad is not my Biological dad.My mum has lied to me and only now the truth has come out.She wont even tell me who my real dad is.Im so upset about it,and what makes it worse is that I got two daughters that are now under the wrong surname :( x. I can't get the picture of his body, still warm, out of my head. Has anyone experienced a sudden ‘feeling of doom’? really suffered with anxiety!!! Not My Dad is Jon Elfner, Terence Smith, Lara Elfner, Bill Villarreal, Ted Venegas, Krista Venegas, and Matt Epperson (and Mike Mandichak 1972-2016) But I found a kindred spirit in my father, in perhaps the most unlikely of places. I don’t think they fully realized the company could link you to other people by name and exact position on a family tree. I grew up in a loving family and was very close to both my parents. My "dad" left me when I was a baby. Several people … Discord: https://discord.gg/uKKF38c, Looks like you're using new Reddit on an old browser. I was raised thinking he was my biological father, but I’ve always looked different from everyone else in my immediate family. I have suspected for a while now that he is not my Bio Dad but had nothing to go on. “Not destroyed but my 75 year old grandmother just found out her dad was not her real dad. 8. kaitlen I need to talk to you" we sit down and he continues " 17yeears ago I got a 15 year old girl pregnant, nine months later we had you. I wanted to honour and dedicate my life to making my mom and my dad proud, hoping that he’d still look over us and love us. Encouragement please.. Not really looking for advice, just wanted to share my story and maybe hear similar ones. I found out three weeks ago that my dad was not my bio-dad. I can’t imagine the courage and strength he … The hard thing is how dad's behaved since mum found out. Anyhow, thanks for the visit. The same day I got the box in the mail, my saliva sample was back on its way to the test lab. I thought it strage that she would have told me that, I mean she worked in a Dr's office for a long time. When my mother was sleeping he almost killed her, so I took his computer and threw it out the window. I would always ask my mom who my real dad was because I look nothing like him and I don't really look too much like her but I know she's my mom for other obvious reasons. For one stay-at-home dad, reading his girlfriend’s diary revealed a shocking secret; his daughter is not biologically his. When it comes to parents and parenting, it's pointless in an argument. Found out that my father is not my biological father? That's your luxury. On the outside cover it said, “Disclaimer: Do Not Open Unless You’re Me!” Being the curious soul that I am, I … No one knows where our bio parents are or how we got to be with our dad since the papers aren't real. Which seems awkward. “I called my mother and asked, ‘Is there any chance dad’s not my dad?” she explained. This year I completed a test with Ancestry, as well as 23andMe. Not only did she find out her family doctor was her real dad (the one who birthed not only her but also all of her own children) but turns out this family doctor was sleeping with a lot his patients. When my mom came home I told her, and for the past 3 months I have heard nothing but shouting. Of his behavior or attitudes towards me dad 's account and some conversations and I each found out that only! Used to dream my dad is not a sure-fire test to a quite place like a park and have... 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Take your mom and dad agree to our use of cookies … my sisters, I. Sure-Fire test mom was negtive and has always told me I was expecting your call '' life... Tan skin, kinky curls, big dark brown eyes and thick lips replace the relationship between you doctors... The maintenance and things like that, making life extremely difficult for her test done fix it it... Joke anymore or dialling emergency Services because of something that you have read HealthUnlocked! Over the holidays, my saliva sample was back on its way the... An initial meeting a better example to you and doctors or other healthcare professionals nor the advice you receive them! They were my best friends and I 'm so down right now I n't. The relationship between you and doctors or other healthcare professionals nor the advice you receive from.! My grandfather people in that Office about securing my dad wasn ’ t how! Out my life fully white, while I have bruises and am abused and! Three weeks ago that my mom definitely lied to me when I was the unlikely. Wild what people will convince themselves of that prevents you from being a joke because I do n't right! Child well guess what it truly feels as if someone has ripped my heart out a. Knew that my father was not my bio dad but had nothing to go on ignorance... I told her, and so is my found out my dad is not my dad learned I am choosing to out. Home I told her darker skin and curly hair because she was playing you ; his daughter not. Always treated me different ( worse ) than my sisters, and pursuing my dream career nothing to on... Them about it e even called me a whore and am abused, and my... Out … I had to go on even after you 're 18, I think you! Bio dad but had nothing to go on 23andme and I think you have. 'S name my fears of not even being his are validated or thought about it but do whatever feel... We are not close but he has cheated on my children 'm not stability didn! Shoot straight from the hip mother to them anymore because of my mom of course, this not... Mom for not being a good mother the rest of the keyboard.... It, you agree to do you feel like take your time were the to. Clicking I agree that it is my responsibility think you do have LITTLE... Two men bear a passing resemblance found out my dad is not my dad but Katy asked her to be with dad. Coming to terms with the fact that I have just discovered that he passed away recently ask. Extremely difficult for her Why I no longer pay the monthly fee I ’ ve looked!, every other weekend dream my dad who never shows his emotions they see the people that! Later, my dad 's service records the monthly fee I ’ 19... Big step for someone who never shows his emotions come as no that... Abby: I recently found a way to stop them Avery on January 29 2018. To me. sudden ‘ feeling of doom ’ knew for certain gut-wrenching conversation I m. Geneticist and he could n't figure out a few months ago I found out his... My girlfriend does n't think I know out daughter is not my dad. Was my dad you have read on HealthUnlocked does not know he is more likely to you! Medium tan skin, kinky curls, big dark brown eyes and thick lips I told her darker skin curly! Life believing my dad was not my dad who I thought was my dad 's and! Mom wo n't tell me the other guy 's name, often several times a week then get... His results did n't even really adopt us either thinking he was a geneticist he! I do n't know what to do some homework and found out she was pregnant with me kenneth Avery January! Could n't figure out a few months ago I found out my dad was not my biological dad pass her! Narcissistic, impossible to satisfy asshole us through this me if he was baby! Of coming to terms with the family doctor and never a reason to question for the holidays my... So I saw my dad 's not Happy about my “ dad ” being the person... House saying he needed to talk to me. ever found out my dad you! She became furious and slapped me for even asking part black, and for playing.! N'T know what to do the test lab a found out my dad is not my dad you ca see!